From the Proprietary Instances that Must Be, written by Monks of Wichita.

“For it shall be known, that in the days of tall things lit by sun jars, the words of the Great Festivus will be recited by the box that is not fire, yet is fire, but is confusing because it neither is or isn’t fire, yet is created with similar attributes that fire may be associated with under circumstances concerning modes of energy transmission that has yet to be understood without the guidance of God.”

“Then shall the words of Festivus be kindled upon the coming snows, amidst the frozen and bleak unknown that has called upon us to run away wearing wool. But nay! The song of Festivus urges the remittance of demons, reminds us we are covered and we are warm. That we have enough in our leather sacks to trudge the tundra and look into the great large dark things with eyes that are kind, full of wonder, and wisdom.
Kind for we’ve felt the sting of slaps upon our souls.
Wonder for the world she holds mysteries in her curves.
Wisdom because we have danced in the fires and heard the true song of Festivus.”

“A great day it shall be! The skies will light with colours unknown! Lives will reincarnate as days pass into eves! The people will rejoice with buffoonery, for they shall know the greatest gifts are in the laughter of a simple soul. When the true song of Festivus permeates the atmosphere and fertilizes the inner ear, know that it is the signal of the birth of something new.”


~ by ambur on December 8, 2011.

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